tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093024142021646941.post7652713752716999964..comments2023-07-14T06:53:02.936-07:00Comments on The Parents Via Egg Donation Organization: Disclosure tricky for parents of egg donor kidsPVEDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15193705233283347207noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6093024142021646941.post-50753953474436098922008-03-26T13:35:00.000-07:002008-03-26T13:35:00.000-07:00Disclosure is tricky in a large part due to the in...Disclosure is tricky in a large part due to the inappropriate language that counselling professionals continue to use in conjunction with advising parents how to talk about germ cell assistance in sharing the creation story of their children. Disclosure to a child about his or her birth origins needs to be understood as a distinct issue from disclosure to other persons of interest be they family or medical professionals. The latter decision has its own criteria based on our child's future medical needs and our particular cultural/family values. As with all other decisions pertaining to our children, we parents are in the best position to assess the risks and benefits of disclosure to whom on behalf of our children. <BR/>All parents need to understand that children are not primarily defined by nature (genetics) any more than they are by nurture (womb, or later environment). Having struggled with infertility, we know better than most, that our children were created ONLY because we envisioned them and worked hard to bring them to life as no spontaneously conceived child will ever be. Our children have every right to understand that no one else even comes close to the role of parent, no matter how generous the contribution, be it a womb or a cell that provides a partial or even a total blueprint.<BR/>The bottom line is:<BR/><BR/>Until the professionals start to get their own thinking straight about the recommended language to use in disclosure, parents are right to trust in their reluctant instincts. The minute I hear or read inappropriate adoption language recommended,such as "I am your spiritual mother, (or)... your life-giver,but your biological mother is...." I know the advice is going to be inappropriate and confusing to the child. A mother is a mother is a mother, and our children deserve to enjoy the exclusivity of that relationship as with any other child.Lonny Higgins, MD, FACOGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04831857238392135091noreply@blogger.com